Have you ever had that kind of deja vu that feels more like looking in a mirror than living a broken record? I’m talking about those weird moments when someone says or does something and you immediately think, “ah hell…I do that same thing…”

A number of people in my life have played the role of deja-mirror for me recently and to say that I haven’t been put off by the bitter reflections would be a lie. I’m not happy with what I see. Ironically, the pessimistic outlook on life and the cynicism oozing out my pores represent two of those aforementioned reflectors that I keep seeing in strangers, customers, and friends.

Just like with a real mirror, my sight is distorted by preconceived beliefs and biases. The foundation set prior to gaining perspective does more damage than an Instagram filter. So what do we do?

Process the collective – There are a lot of identifiers and informants out there to help you get an accurate view of self, including your own perspective. Take the whole and let the data do the talking. Every method has its limitations, but this is an important one. Appealing to community is a key factor to self-identification. Futhermore…

Light and Dark – Accept the cheery and the depressing together. It might seem like a contradiction, but the happy and sad can dwell together in a singular space. A child going to college is an example of this dualistic, emotional state as the parent feels joy over the sad event of their child moving on to something new.

Emotional and Logical – Too often, emotions become the thermometer for gauging our lives, but emotions are limited. Logic is helpful but it’s cold and callous. The two together, however, work in harmony to provide a better perspective. We need the logic to process emotions and the emotions to keep our logic in check.

We travel the journey of self discovery every day, moving closer and closer to seeing the person we are designed to be. As you move through life, I pray that you will be able to implement these things and make that journey a little easier…and quicker!


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